thoughts

We are getting by. =) I am feeling in a state of fuzz. Tobi has decided he likes to be awake best in the middle of the night and not just look around awake, Mama will you hold me up awake. =) It makes the daytime interesting. I am struggling with balancing all of this. We are doing it and to some degree we are doing well, but I am having a hard time with Will now. He seems to think that anytime I am not looking he can run wild and get into everything he knows very well he is not suppose to. God promises to give us wisdom when we ask for it and I feel like I need this more than anything. I am stuck when it comes to Will. He challenges me beyond anything I have known. I can snap at him so quick that it breaks my heart. I know it is not his fault and I need to come to some sort of, I don't know. This is something I Really don't want to fail in. I don't want Will to be pushed to the side and I want to realize what I need to be and do for him. I pray that I can be the best mom for him that I can be. I am overwhelmed with my humanness when it comes to that boy. I am surprised and the things that come out of me when I am dealing with him. I feel that all I do is come down on him and that I am constantly correcting him.

I know that this is a phase and that we will get through it, I just want to do it the best I can.