FULL of Joy!!
I am so full of joy. I have had the amazing gift of a thing called Focus. My good friend Dani would mention Focus here and there and I always wondered how something like a seminar could make such an impact on someone's life. At one point I remember talking to her saying how I had so many things in my life I wanted to change but, I just didn't know how. She asked if I would consider doing Focus and I said, "why not?"
SO... October 9th (my birthday) I went to the seminar called Focus. I knew no one, knew nothing of what I should expect, and walked into a room that would change my life. In that room I found something that had escaped me for way too long, I found ME!! Through a lot of HARD work, a lot of love and encouragement, I waded through the garbage that blocked who I really was. To be honest this was the hardest thing I have ever gone through but I knew that my beautiful Dani loved me very much and something great was on the other end. I even almost left at one point, but I am soooo glad I didn't. I found the ability to say that I love myself and that I am proud of who I am and what I am becoming. By doing this I feel so free to give the love I so desperately would try to give but would fall short. I gave and left nothing for myself. No, it was not some miracle cure but, in a way I feel it was because it gave me the tools and the support I needed to break down the walls that surrounded me. I am a truly blessed woman and I feel as if I have been given a new chance at life.
I stepped away from the Baby Place a few weeks ago. Through some searching and praying about how to still be on the path to becoming a midwife I came across a great opportunity. I am going to sign up with the National College Of Midwifery through a husband and wife home birth midwife practice in town. It was timing and what I really feel God's knocking on my heart saying , "look what I have for you if you just trust ME." I am starting the college work this month and I am very excited to be on a definitive path. My schedule will be next to nothing with about 2 births a month. The schedule will allow me to focus on school and not let my family suffer. I am also excited to see the home birth side of midwifery. This is the next chapter in the Stacia book.
Matt is doing well too. He is going to school with Ashford University online. Which is great for him because he can do it at work and not have to take up too much family time. He is getting his degree in History and he is really enjoying it. It helps the long coffee hours to go by while he is working.
Matt and I are doing well and growing so much individually that we are growing together. I did Focus on my own and I am so thankful for that. He is doing some other things on his own that challenges him and it is amazing to see him change and grow. We both have a lot of work ahead of us with what we are doing in our marriage but, for the first time in a long time we feel we are going in the same direction together. Isn't God amazing??
I am overcome with the amazing grace that spills over when I have stepped out in obedience. It is HARD but, so rewarding. Again, it isn't a magic "poof" but to step out and take those leaps of faith into the unknown is... I don't even have the words. I just want so desperately to give Him ALL the glory because without Him none of this would be happening. I am so loved and blessed with the people in my life. Thank you all for all you have done for me.
GOD IS GOOD!!
SO... October 9th (my birthday) I went to the seminar called Focus. I knew no one, knew nothing of what I should expect, and walked into a room that would change my life. In that room I found something that had escaped me for way too long, I found ME!! Through a lot of HARD work, a lot of love and encouragement, I waded through the garbage that blocked who I really was. To be honest this was the hardest thing I have ever gone through but I knew that my beautiful Dani loved me very much and something great was on the other end. I even almost left at one point, but I am soooo glad I didn't. I found the ability to say that I love myself and that I am proud of who I am and what I am becoming. By doing this I feel so free to give the love I so desperately would try to give but would fall short. I gave and left nothing for myself. No, it was not some miracle cure but, in a way I feel it was because it gave me the tools and the support I needed to break down the walls that surrounded me. I am a truly blessed woman and I feel as if I have been given a new chance at life.
I stepped away from the Baby Place a few weeks ago. Through some searching and praying about how to still be on the path to becoming a midwife I came across a great opportunity. I am going to sign up with the National College Of Midwifery through a husband and wife home birth midwife practice in town. It was timing and what I really feel God's knocking on my heart saying , "look what I have for you if you just trust ME." I am starting the college work this month and I am very excited to be on a definitive path. My schedule will be next to nothing with about 2 births a month. The schedule will allow me to focus on school and not let my family suffer. I am also excited to see the home birth side of midwifery. This is the next chapter in the Stacia book.
Matt is doing well too. He is going to school with Ashford University online. Which is great for him because he can do it at work and not have to take up too much family time. He is getting his degree in History and he is really enjoying it. It helps the long coffee hours to go by while he is working.
Matt and I are doing well and growing so much individually that we are growing together. I did Focus on my own and I am so thankful for that. He is doing some other things on his own that challenges him and it is amazing to see him change and grow. We both have a lot of work ahead of us with what we are doing in our marriage but, for the first time in a long time we feel we are going in the same direction together. Isn't God amazing??
I am overcome with the amazing grace that spills over when I have stepped out in obedience. It is HARD but, so rewarding. Again, it isn't a magic "poof" but to step out and take those leaps of faith into the unknown is... I don't even have the words. I just want so desperately to give Him ALL the glory because without Him none of this would be happening. I am so loved and blessed with the people in my life. Thank you all for all you have done for me.
GOD IS GOOD!!
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